As some of you may know, my daughter, Muffy Winters, has been kidnapped. I have been instructed by her captors, La Gata Negra, not to contact the police. I have complied with their requests. I have also offered a large sum of cash for my beloved daughters return, to no avail. My last hope lies in the efforts of Malicious Mile Heidi, and The Wrathalie to find her, and bring her back to safety.
However, I hope that her time imprisoned has given her an important life lesson. At first I was eager to release her, but I feel that my years of spoiling her, has given her an unhealthy look on life. Although I love my daughter very much, her time as BLOWW general manager has corrupted her with absolute power. I had hoped that getting her ass kicked on a regular basis from the girls of BLOWW would have helped, but it has not helped one bit. Hopefully her time with LGN will teach her that she can't always get away with whatever she wants.
Regardless, I would like her safe return. So my message to LGN: keep her safe, make sure she gets her adderal and xanax, or she'll get really cranky, and slap her around if she gets out of line.
Sincerely,
Mr. Winters
Owner and CEO, Boston League of Women Wrestlers
2 comments:
yo mista winters
your wife dead yet? if not, i don't discriminate.
holla at me, old'n.
Ninja Ho, learn to practice some restraint or at least be a little more discreet. jeez.
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